Five reasons for David Seymour's dream DWTS run

Spy News,
Publish Date
Thursday, 14 June 2018, 10:11PM

Act MP David Seymour's continued presence as a contestant on Dancing With The Stars is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma.

Despite the fact even the smallest scrap of rhythm still eludes the politician, he has so far managed to escape the show's dreaded dance-off.

With judges Camilla Sacre-Dallerup, Julz Tocker and Rachel White consistently scoring Seymour well below the other DWTS contestants, it’s clear the public are texting in their droves to keep him there.

So, who exactly is voting for the man who stomps the beauty out of the art of ballroom dancing every week?

We have a few theories...

The mum vote

With that hopeful smile plastered on his face through his painfully awkward dance routines, we imagine everyone's Mum has got a soft spot for David Seymour.

"Look at him. He's just trying SO hard," they’re probably thinking to themselves as they reach for their phone to drop a casual $20 on text votes.


A post shared by David Seymour (@dbseymour) on May 26, 2018 at 10:15pm PDT


It's a youthquake!

The strongest theory yet is that the youth of New Zealand have got nothing better to do with their time (or money) than to repeatedly text vote for David Seymour and his two left feet.

And who can blame them when the reward for spamming the text voting lines with Seymour's name is getting to see an MP in fluorescent, skin-tight active wear and sparkly shoes of a Sunday evening?


A post shared by David Seymour (@dbseymour) on Jun 9, 2018 at 8:36pm PDT


Is it the Kremlin?

The Russians have already been accused of running a campaign to disrupt the 2016 US presidential election.

Perhaps somebody in Moscow saw a YouTube clip of Seymour's rumba and thought hijacking the DWTS vote would also be good for a giggle?

Yeah, probably not.


A post shared by David Seymour (@dbseymour) on May 13, 2018 at 10:33pm PDT


Down with reality TV?

Could Herald columnist Steve Braunias be right?

Are Kiwis hoping to crown David Seymour the Dancing With The Stars champion so as to make sure the competition never ever returns to our screens? 

"The show already is a calamitous tragedy thanks to the continued presence of the creature from the Act lagoon," writes Braunias.

"[DWTS] should be razed. Seymour is the flaming torch; vote DAVID 3333, and throw petrol on the fire."



It's a government campaign

A couple of weeks ago, Seymour shared a text message he received from former Labour Party president Mike Williams.

In the message, Williams said he was voting for Seymour on DWTS so as to "keep the most effective Opposition MP away from parliament".

Could this be the basis for Seymour's dancefloor popularity? Do the Labour MPs have a roster for spamming the DWTS vote line in the hopes of keeping his days full with dance rehearsals? Is this what Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern will be preoccupying herself with while she waits for her baby to arrive?

Or perhaps all five of the above groups are texting in their votes for Seymour? Could he be getting the support of everyone's mum, the nation's teenagers, the Russians, those who hate reality TV AND the government?

If so, he should probably start clearing some space in his electorate office to display that glitterball trophy he's going to win in a few weeks' time...